Right now, I’m not at the beginning.
I’m standing somewhere along the path, not the middle of a timeline, but at a place where the ground finally feels steady beneath my feet.
And I’m starting to see the clearing ahead.
The past was creative chaos.
The kind of chaos one must walk through.
Even during the most difficult times,
I stayed.
It wasn’t wasted.
It was a time of gathering information and experiences.
A time of learning how to notice.
A time of awakening.
Awareness, awareness within me, and awareness outside of me.
Everything that happened before this moment had a reason.
The unfolding is real.
And it has been essential.
Here I am, standing before myself.
Finally able to feel my body again.
Hear my body again.
Sometimes I even ask myself: Did I ever really feel it before?
I think because I am such a sensitive soul with a sensitive body, there were always so many signals moving through me, information coming in, energy moving out — that I never knew which sensations were mine to keep.
So I held them all.
Every single one of them.
I honored them inside this vessel, even the ones that were not meant for me to keep.
I am not angry.
I am not resentful.
It no longer upsets me.
Because now I can see.
I understand.
This has been a process.
The process has been mine.
The story has been mine.
And it is mine to tell.
It is who I was.
It is who I am.
And it is who I will become.
Now my story is unfolding.
Wildflowers don’t rush.
They survive.
And I can finally see the horizon ahead of me,
not as a scary stretch of uncertainty,
but as a living forest,
wild in places,
tender in others,
a place I don’t need to conquer,
only to walk into. 🌿
Prayer of Gratitude
Grateful for the body that stayed.
For the wisdom gathered along the way.
For the clarity that arrived when I was ready.
May I continue gently.
May I continue listening.
May I continue to trust what unfolds.